12-30 Poem

Who was I
Teenage orphans know
Saddness burried far beneath
Smiles that deceive sorrow

Barders made by birthright
Bear life, ignorant but blamed
Children and babies carryon sins
From kinship who share lastname

Brokenhearted charms
Hung by faith and security
Encrusted by betrayal
Round this lastborn's misery

Hurried to be done
Dispelled to Wed me away
Disobedience, an unruly child
Eyes for truth see how well we the bad obey

A love then so fragile gone
Ignited inflamed to ash
Hushed secrets wanting to be told
Pained most seemed no on cared to ask

Loved him first and most of all
With leftover love to be had
It was all a lie as it be told
One big fable I only'd wish this deceitful heart ever said

Such opposition of what shouldve been
Left me a mess that Fall day
Wouldve been easier just to die
Than have it be him too who wished me away

Riddled hearts survive
Hope babtised twice over in tears
A fight I made my own
Riddled hearts grow acute fears

To fraid to surpress and forget
Of wealth which lives in every detail
Or keep so close the bouts
There'd be no child to tell

To weigh whether lost or gained
O judge right or wrong o'er tragedy
Life wills whether we do or dont
We choose our own debauchery

12/22

Winter first
Winter fast
When hurts
Make winners last

Season's change
A fickle heart
Not quick to Fall
Love became art

Tears
Flooded my Spring
Winter wont have joy
Without sacrifcing

12/21 Poem

That's too bad for us
I'm sure of it for me
He became thy lost love
I needed subconciously

Squandered forgiveness
Led this fool's fragile heart astray
Stubborn thy mind to concieve
Potential felicity reason to stay

An intentional diversion
Although relunctant I learned
Hurt begets hurt
Lest redemption be earned

As the story be told
I met a stranger whom I loved
Pedastled in admiration
Priced his needs, mine above

I defied gravity to hover
Paralytically on borrowed time
In fear any upset would confirm
Thy hopes of us were just mine

Settled to recoarse as friends
I knew him to fail any change
He who abandons once
If allowed to, will again and again

A fool for love
Is what I made me
Blind eyes found refuge
To prevalent treachery

Cloaked by pain I deserve
Strength now but none then to leave
Him a mere tyrannical mortal
Athena he not better to beseige

Only if he knew
The lesson he burdened himself to teach
If and when learned, robbed him
Of the love so reverently beseeched

If I knew of him at all
He wanted to care, even lovingly
Let the stars be cursed
Vexed now to thy memory

Hear me confess
That be but my one regret
Thy fallacies t'with love
Novices, fail sure by his suspect

Bless'd to have known
Someone with what made him me
Alone dispelled from loneliness
Newfound conviction with security